By Daniel Jacob, MSW
You ever have one of those moments when you are in the midst of it all, and then you stop and… Life is so much about just that, the ability to pause, and catch yourself immersed into that cycle of challenge that often takes on a force and direction of its own. The next step, the most important of all, is up to you. This week I had one of these moments that allowed me to pause, breathe, and take another opportunity to practice what I know to be the only way. My week has been a busy one, several projects going on at the same time, all of which are dependent on the collaboration and interaction with others. This in itself was the source of my challenge, waiting on others in order to move forward with something that I was prepared for, ready for, and waiting for! I put myself in a state that had me sorting through, figuring out, and contemplating what I had no control over; another persons timing, work ethic, inability to effectively follow through and communicate. All of these factors, and perhaps others that I do not need to further acknowledge had me in that vulnerable place, with my hope and being unable to complete my duties, and thus meet my own expectation.
“All the advice in the world will never help you until
you help yourself.”
~ Fred Van Amburgh
If you‘ve been a follower of mine for some time now then you may of have heard me discuss the idea of our own “expectation” and how this can ultimately lead to further challenge and difficulty if you are unable to meet it. You see, when you recognize that it is your “expectation” and it doesn’t always act accordingly, realistically, practically, and any other word that ends in “ly” that may fit this example, you are able to understand. The source of my challenge and subsequent stress was indeed not being able to meet my expectation, and the experience of frustration and disappointment that presented themselves as a result. So, I had to implement what I am able to practice because I have acquired the necessary tools and skills to do so. I had to acknowledge, recognize, and appreciate where I was at! I had to practice what I speak to, and what I empower and support others to do in similar circumstances. I was now the student, and my lesson and further learning was calling my name. I had to stop, breathe, and remember that everything will work itself out, no matter how it plays out I am still here, I am still giving and receiving, and I am still able to accomplish my goals at hand. Therefore, it is unnecessary to create more stress for myself and my overall well-being needs, and it is time to let this one go!
“No matter what happens, it is within my power to
turn it to my advantage.”
I cannot be in the position to help others change for the better, if I myself do not practice what I know to be true. I am here to say and share that the learning and opportunity to add further to our awareness is present at all times, as long as you are able to see it. I have embraced the path that I am on, helping others change for the better, but I am nowhere to be found in the process of, if I can‘t help myself. So, as you reflect and digest my words for the week, may this find you in that place and space that can help you help yourself, while continuing to move forward. Thank you for affording me the opportunity to be heard. There have been many rewards involved in my efforts to help others, and one of them is the ability and opportunity I have been given to help myself. I aspire to do many great things within this field, and I will always complement that with the self work that I continually put into action, because without me at my best, I have no chance to reach those in need! May the weekend be well to you, and you be well to your time to breathe. Until we meet again…
“There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.”
~ Denis Waitley